Friday, May 29, 2009


A friend : Dude, Hasith got crabs man... shit !... the fucker got crabs !

Me : So?

A friend : yakooo... crabs maan.. the STD you nutfuck !

Me : Oh !.. so ?

A friend : So ?? So?? what the heck you mean SO???...

Me : eerrrr... well... so he has it ! .. what the heck you want me to do about it.. and how the FUCK did you get to know about it?

A friend : Machang, he told me.. he told me that he got crabs in his "pubics" and it has got to his shirt and he's going to try and wash it off

Me : WTF ? .... wait... hold on... to wash it off ?

A friend : yeah.. man... imagine that.. now I am not going to the wash room anymore man !.. shit.. shit shit !.. these fuckers.. they fuck whore and get STD's and spread it around us as well...

Me: Bro.. there's a saying in "Buddhism" that "Kiyanna kesey kiwaath, asanna sihi budhdiyen asiya yuthui" (no matter what another say, the listener has to listen with some brains over the matter) ... you sure that he said something like that ? .. cause I don't think you can wash crabs away... lolzzzz

Right then............ like god sent... the man in question popped in with a wet shirt below his navel.

Me : Why the shirt wet bro?

Hasith : Ah, machang... Amma packed some Crabs for lunch machang.. Ate it a bit privately cause you can't munch those damn things in "PUBLIC"... and spilled a little on the shirt.. so washed off.

Me : (turning to my friend) do you want me to throw something heavy and metalic at you first... or would you apologize to this guy here and get on with what ever the fuck you were doing before came to me with bullshit gozzip.. asshole !

There you go.. another fine example of

1. My office is filled with fucking idiots
2. Listen with brains rather than ears... sometimes the most simplest things can be blown sky high by fucking morons.
3. Ask you mum never to pack Crabs


  1. is it just you or your background? you never can say ten words w/o saying nine "fuck"s

  2. @Anonymous

    1. Growing up with English as the first language of preference.

    2. Growing up with two morons of stupid dick head fucking idiot brothers whom always tend to be go happy and go lucky to fight and argue !

    3. Growing up with parents who always opted to see the soul of a son grow better than his language.

    4. Growing up with the worst of crowed during the schooling days.

    5. Growing up with the idea of learning to swear in a language get's you pretty much anywhere you want to go with a person / crowd (trust me.. it works ! .. I even know how to say FUCK YOU in Spanish)

    6. Growing up with the mindset of not caring about what others may think about your language rather than letting people judge you by your deeds.

    Yes.. I do say fuck you nine times out of ten !

    But I do promise you that I am much much much better in deed, thought and action than who never utter a bad word !

    I drink.. I smoke.. I swear... and one thing you can be sure of that I never keep anything in my heart and backstab you !

    So... isn't it always better to put up with me and a little FUCK YOU's rather than a fucking bastard whom you can never trust to as what he/she thinks?

  3. haha very funny..srsly - what a 'Gossip uncle' that dude is! last victim - TAG you're IT!.

  4. @Nash

    well if u take it that way... yeah.. its better to put up with ur little fucks than work with the back stabbers... but unlike you i worry about what others think.. and english was alien till i came to grade 10.

    the story was great.. and i'm sure ur a great person too... do try to lose up with the fucks. it might get u a much broader audience.