Thursday, November 22, 2012

women drivers, gay's, prostitutes and Dimo batta lorries.

Siting down and drinking a beer at the pub.. ironically a place named "the pub" in Kandy. To be blunt and out, i must say i would never ever live in this place even if they were to pay me for it.  One of the most sleepiest cities i have ever set foot upon and i will bear witness that even the most remotest parts of Tibet has more active night life than this. Where does all the people go after 6.30 in this god forsaken city?

Women? .. great looking with thier uptight faces, "udarata saree" and the " i' am so fucking proud to be a Kandian" look on their faces and literally walk around as their pussies and aligned with gold and stapled to their foreheads !!!! .. Bah ! I am just too off thrown even not to bother about the damn women and i am tied in a knot which i am not suppose to fuck around let them roam free without the any hinderense  from me. Lolzz.. no, not sour grapes ! . I am just not bothered.

This is apparently the sixth day i am spending in the city and i am just so bored. So much so that i am blogging in a pub!!!! A Pub by definition is where they actually came up with virtual chat rooms sans you cant get drunk on virtual booz. But here  i am almost bored to death with loneliness.  May be weekends are better, but judging by the way things going and from what i saw,  i doubt the holy fuck out of it.

Well, my fourth beer is over, and  i am still effin board. May be i should start watching some films over in my notebook. 

But then again., i guess this is as much as a good time than any to talk about women drivers, gay's, prostitutes and Dimo batta lorries. 

I have no idea actually how such oddly unconnected subjects just sprung out of my mind.. may be the alcohol is screwing up the neurons. btw.. nerd fact.. i just learnt over the bbc last night that neurons are like thoroughbred horses... they have all sort of petty small blood cells to do all the shit work and they would just sit pretty and electrify the brain. I humbly concur ladies and gentlemen...alcohol is shit facing me as exampled.. now I am running on the 7th and i got to take a leak really fast or i will piss on my pants. 

ok.. back ! .. now.. women drivers !

I am actually one of the first people (of whom i happen to know about) applauded the idea of "mass" female drivers in these little scooty peps and little mini size cars. when many said that they are just taking the fun out of driving....irritating and nonsense.... i always said that women should be equally enjoying the freedom men take granted for and they are great law abiding drivers. 

that was close to 10 years ago....

and now... BLOODY HELL ... from the moment i actually stepped back in SL... i am running into fantastic... brave...great women drivers who all together better at negotiating the crazy Colombo traffic just than all the men. I am no sexist pig.. but i just think it's fantastic...... yeah.. until i ran into the women racing drivers.

as a thumb rule, i believe women can't judge distances and space just by eye measure. Take that fundamental flaw of their natural make and put them into a swarm of crazy colombo traffic. ALL HELL BREAK LOOSE ! .. i tell ya.. these women are the she-devil re-incarnated themselves. Sneaking through here, there in these flimsy bikes and cutting you in front in cars is just too much.  So, in my shit-faced and fucked up state of alcohol marinated 6 foot tall self mine says that we should BAN all women drivers. (i might regret this later..)

Prostitutes and Gays..... nothing much to report on that actually. Seems that on virtual outlook, the city of Kandy is free from all such nonsense. but., dig deep and talk to the right people., i just witnessed first hand that the flesh business is thriving here. way more than quite popular cities like Hikkaduwa even. surprisingly it's quite easy compared to other parts of the country to get laid here !

for what it's worth ! ... i support all you women /  men who are in the business.. and if you are a bisexual, gay, lesbian, cd, or ts (both natural and opted) i am a life time member of the the equal grounds ! power to you mates !!!

 Dimo batta drivers - I JUST FUCKING HATE YOU SONS OF BITCHES !! I concluded that 99% of these drivers are idiots who just got their driving licenses and all of them are BLIND MOTHERFUCKERS !  know this ASSHOLES- in a vehicle.. there are two types of front lights. They are called  Dim light.. and Head light. The former is used for everyday and all the time driving to see the road front and the Latter (head lights) are only used when 

1. There is no one else coming from the opposite direction
2. To signal an on-coming vehicle and turn it back to the dim light
3. To be used in dire situations when you can't see the front of you (ie, Mist, snow, heavy rain etc)
4. and of course to signal if there are cops ahead.


1. to switch it on from the start of the vehicle till the end of the journey 

Read carefully you FUCKING RETARDS !! ... we can't drive on the roads because of you MOTHERFUCKING STUPID, ARROGANT, BLIND SONS OF BITCHES !!! who just goes driving merrily while all other drivers end up with headaches cause of your bright head lights.

wow.. i never thought i hate them that much !

anyways.. time to head off.. i am shit-faced and sleepy.... some MJ music is playing over the over head speakers.. so let me end this post with a tribute to MJ

MJ - even though the KING is gone... the beat goes on and on .... 

Thursday, November 15, 2012

I am back and it's just Legen.......wait for it..........

I have completely forgotten about the blog community.  ... can't blame or i won't let anyone blame me or if anyone even comes close to it.. I will sue the shit out of you for it.

Been buzy as hell.. as usual... but then again about 2 months back i made my self back to the lovely fucked up, messed up, shitted up country that I call home. Sri Lanka.

But then again, this is the best of times and the worst of times in Sri Lanka , don't you think? 800 cc Maruti cars had gone up from 2.5 lacks making sure that we will not give away money to the stinking Indians... but hey.. why not support the crumpling economy of Europe and buy our selves some Ferrari's and Porsche's while at it.

I love this country. Anyone who advocates that we are better off in a wealthy country is a narcissistic son of a bitch who should be butt fucked to death by a HIV positive donkey. ( Don't you just love my eccentric language and colourful use of examples ???)  Wealthy countries are for pussies who can't make it out on their own and needs someone else to have already done it for them.

With regard to the blog, the best thing that happened was to find Malee's number in an old phone sim of mine and the fact that she is still using that number even after 4-5 years. Talk about brand loyalty ! ! ! !... and found out that she was married !!

"THE FUCK????" she married ?? .. who ?? then again I was smashed in the junk (literary by her own words via sms ) that she has brand loyalty even when it comes to MEN ! .. well coneffingrats Malee. :)  and that i mean from the bottom of my heart ! . . you both should be blessed with all the happiness, joy, wonder and not forgetting cute little brats just like you till death shall part you both.

(ps . if you have a problem down the line.. let me know and i will run over the guy with a car and let death do you apart... just one call mate.. just one call and it will be done :)  )

and there i was wrecking my brains out the entire night trying to retrieve the username and the password which i use to log into the blog to make a post .....

Getting back to the country issue....

Seriously, in which country can you get away with not following road rules for 200 bux?? well in India you can do it for 20 rupees or if you are even remotely connected to Dawood Ibrahim... but that's just the "rolling  R" cow dung pudding smearing Indians.!! .. not in any great effin wondrous country like ours. And in which great country you can insult the government and get a free ride in a chauffeur driven "White Van" with personal security???  

Anyways... going on and on ranting about this country either going make me sick or if I am lucky, i will too get a free ride in a van..

But then again.....I am back... and I have a love-hate relationship with this country... AND Malee is married.

oh... and


(if you got the first and the last part.. you are in the Barney Stinson bro hood with me !